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The better question is whether a lot of kids pop off to me. Someone pops off to me every day some weeks. But it’s always the same few kids. And in my experience, I’ve always had more of these kids in the first semester than in the second. Most of the time I think this is because I’m a social weirdo, and in all situations, social, professional, or otherwise, it takes other people a while to decide I’m okay. ~whatever. no energy for that. i tried like hell to have energy for that for so long, i’m giving up. i’ll be the old lady with all the clocks and cats who talks to herself while she shuffles around in her slippers, chasing imaginary dogs out of the yard~ So the kids can hardly be blamed for not knowing if I’m balanced or not. ~i am~
It’s also because I think about what I do and how to deal with a situation with a student, any situation, not just the “popping off” ones. I don’t wait for a discipline situation to arise. ~but i’m sure any monkey can do my job. just write a national standard for making friends with students. that’ll fix it~ Usually, I’m able to make friends with those students by the end of the year. Most people just want to be friended.
But I have a student right now that I’m really stuck on. I have tried to make friends with him. He’s not going to do it.
This child has been mad in general since I’ve known him this school year. He’s only recently gotten specifically angry at me in the last month or two. This is because I’ve restricted the number of times he can go to the bathroom. I don’t usually do this, but he asks way too often & asks to go any and everywhere else in between. And whenever I’ve let up on the reigns just a little, he hasn’t been trustworthy. While he’s in class he’d rather flirt and text and do any number of other things than do what we’re doing.
No. matter. what. we. are. doing.
It’s not about what we’re doing. It’s about someone telling him what he should be doing. ~in a lot of ways, i understand how he feels~
Now that I’ve pissed him off, he will not do anything at all I ask him to do. He forced me ask him for his cell phone by repeatedly texting while he was supposed to be working, after several warnings. Then he refused to give it to me, telling me to “send him out.” He wanted out. So I had to *escort* him to an assistant principal, asking another teacher to watch my class.
He will not do work for me. ~he has before, but he’s decided he’s done.~ So he’s a kid that has, as far as he’s concerned, nothing to do.
Why did this happen? I don’t blame myself because I know I have tried sincerely to help this child. But I would like to understand it. It seemed to be going well, then it just turned. Suddenly.
When the assistant principal arrived, the student asked if he could be taken out of my class. I’ve never done this before because I think it would hurt the student’s feelings, but if I were in a school where I felt like there was anyone at all in authority I could talk to, I would tell them that if there’s another adult in the building he can connect with, he’s better off with that adult than in my class. We have a better chance of keeping him if we become more flexible and creative with his time.
Just a thought.
6 responses so far ↓
1 Kaelie Curbxstomp // Feb 17, 2008 at 11:33 am
You’re balanced? I never would have guessed…lol. Just kidding, Taylor. Wow, that kid sounds like a twit. I would love to be a teacher, but, unfortunately you have the kids that don’t want to be taught and you’re at a loss for what to do. At least, that’s what I see in a lot of my teachers.
Kaelie Curbxstomp’s last blog post..Seraphim: An Allegorical Tale of Good and Evil
2 student teacher // Feb 17, 2008 at 5:06 pm
One problem teachers have pinning down the reason a student has changed behavior is that we really don’t know what is going on in their personal lives. If he was completing assignments for you in the past and decided to stop because you chose to be his teacher, rather than friend, than I believe he is probably trying to find another teacher he can take advantage of. It sounds to me like he was simply testing you. Is he still in your class? If so, I would try to talk to him to maybe build/bring back respect between the two of you.
student teacher’s last blog post..Snapshot Sunday
3 GingerTPLC // Feb 17, 2008 at 9:48 pm
I have no answers. I have a kid who likes to speak out when I “discipline” another kid. Not when I correct all the kids. Just this one.
I appreciate the first kid’s concern, but he doesn’t know or understand all the work I do with the other kid’s family for a purpose. Nor will he ever understand, since in the interest of confidentiality I can’t explain.
I just have to eat his “feedback” to me in front of the other kids.
Funny how one kid can consume our thoughts so much.
4 Taylor // Feb 18, 2008 at 1:51 pm
I didn’t mean to give the impression that this student just did every bit of work I asked before. It was always a struggle, but it’s just that now it’s personal.
I don’t view him as taking advantage of me. He’s obviously troubled, and I’ve asked for a meeting with his mother (which his other teachers were also eager for) and she didn’t show. I really do want to help him if I can.
I have situations too, where one student expects to be treated the exact same as others, but usually the students’ perception is off. Either that, or there’s an IEP or some other situation that requires me to deal differently. I would probably take the “feedback” student aside and try to address his concerns about how I deal with HIM only, then explain that I’m the one responsible for what goes down in the classroom, and he will just have to trust me.
5 Bloggrrl // Feb 18, 2008 at 8:34 pm
I have a feeling he may come back around. At any rate, the main thing is don’t lose your sense of humor. Humor takes the sting out of having to comply for many an oppositional defiant kiddo. And yeah, I can kinda relate to that too. Good luck.
Bloggrrl’s last blog post..Get Sick, Increase Productivity
6 Taylor // Feb 20, 2008 at 6:31 pm
@bloggrrl I hope you’re right. Today was no better after a day of out-of-school suspension and no meeting with mom. (Second failed attempt.)
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